Friday, February 25, 2011

So I have this friend....

I ended up going to lunch / Target dash with a friend today...we will call her Gracie.  I've always liked the name Gracie, so that will be her secret identity name.  Let me tell you a little bit about my friend Gracie...she's a fighter.  She's gone through quite a bit of drama in recent months and due to her new circumstances she's held up better than most...better than me even though she would argue that.  The things that have happened to her are things you might witness being played out on certain outrageous talk shows or a reality show, but unfortunately reality is a bit brutal at the moment for her.  If you were to hear her story and had the chance to get to know Gracie, you would wonder how this could have happened to her.

Now, when I'm around Gracie I tend to out a little more you ever act different around different people?  I would say 90% of the time I rarely act this goofy...I could go as far as saying I act airheaded.  I've wondered why I act this way with her...and I think it comes down to balance.  If she seems blue or clearly has a lot on her mind, I act silly in hopes to get her mind off the things that have consumed her thoughts for many months.  She will randomly update me on her latest situation and most times the "90% me" comes out and I try to offer advice. 

I know she thinks everyone has labeled her dumb or weak for choosing to remain in her situation for as long as she has, but I don't think any of her Friends feel that way...and we can sit around all day and say if we were in the same situation we would be strong and handle it quickly with confidence, but who really knows how we would handle it??  My hopes for her is that is realizes her worth...I know that sounds very "Joy Luck Club" but it really is the best way to put it.  If she knew how much she was valuable she really was I think the situation would be a little different.  I genuinely do not think God makes love difficult...if it causes you more heartache than happiness what's the point, you know?  You have just one life...and that's it!  Fill it with people that you love and that love you back....and if by chance you come across someone that doesn't treat you as you should be treated, set that person aside, but don't set happiness aside.  Thats like people that say, "I don't go to church anymore because I've been burned by them before..." Really?  You don't stop eating because you had one bad meal do you?  Never put all your happiness in one person...happiness starts from within yourself.  I digress!

The funny thing is when I first met Gracie, I got the impression we would make good friends...we seemed similar.  Granted, I am known for having the worst first impressions of people.  All the people I am close to right now I thought to myself, "Yeah, I don't think we'll be friends" or "Whats up with them??"  Yes, I know that is bad, but hey it's the truth.  The more time I spent with Gracie, I realized there was more going on with her, but it certainly wasn't my place to pry.  It always seemed like she was wondering about something...but thats all I could this goofy personality came out in me to offset her seriousness and dry witt and that is where we are now. 

Anyways! So I have this friend....and I hope she knows that sometimes the hardest part is crossing that line and taking that first step, but just remember you control your happiness. You deserve it just as much as anyone else and the more you tell yourself that the more you'll start to embrace it.   It might not happen right away...there might be some crappy days, but everything good takes time.

I bet you thought I was going to blog about my lunch / Target dash didn't you? Ha!  In a nutshell, we made a quick round through Target where she bought one thing and I bought like 7 and then spend 10 minutes in the car deciding where to eat for lunch...which consisted of her making me sole decision maker, no take backs!  We ended up going to Sonic where I had the new Chicago dog (not bad by the way) and she had cheese tots. 

1 comment:

Young Hwang said...

I've been on both shoes..helping a friend in her difficult years and being fortunate enough to have a friend be there for me when I was letting myself be a victim and going through a lot. That's what friends are for, right? These are the type of friendship that I know will last forever...whether we live nearby or far away. Hope your friend has a better new year...and the friendship will always bring great warmth to your heart. =)

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